詩集-017 足毋甘

足毋甘 足毋甘！少年時頂頭烏油油的黑頭毛，退伍了後煞一直落，足毋甘！ 我足毋甘！意愛的查某，看我沒什毛，就隨便敷衍我，我足毋甘！ 買上貴的洗頭水、生髮油無半項有效，食柔沛閣驚弟弟袂𪁎！暗時行在街仔路，朋友詼講我是路燈，我足毋甘！ 足毋甘！0050佮台積電攏無買著，錯失機會，足毋甘！ 我足毋甘！夢著明牌包牌包幾落萬，每一支攏槓龜，我足毋甘！ 看人住大厝、穿名牌、逐工上飯館食大餐，算命的煞講我無橫財命，叫我老實食頭路、莫肖想，我足毋甘！ 哪會甘！當年送伊九十九蕊玫瑰花，我哪會甘！ 我哪會甘！買遐的袚鍊鑽石表心意，娶伊閣請雙頭車隊！我哪會甘！ 當初講驚肥毋願生，結果仙女這馬食甲像柴耙！佇棉被內放臭屁，閣嫌我睏會齁，叫我去客廳佮狗睏，我足毋甘！ 足毋甘！人生哪會目一下𥍉，二十冬就過去，足毋甘！ 我足毋甘！以前厚實的胸坎，哪會消風變成竹筍奶，我足毋甘！ 醫生警告遐少年就三懸，叫我愛儉喙、莫食甜、莫油莫鹹、莫啉酒閣愛早睏——人生按呢生，規氣來去食菜堂，我實在足毋甘！

Tsiok M̄-kam Tsiok m̄-kam! Siàu-liân sî tíng-thâu oo-iû-iû ê oo-thâu-môo, thè-ngóo liáu-āu suah it-ti̍t lak, tsiok m̄-kam! Guá tsiok m̄-kam! Ì-ài ê tsa-bóo, khuànn guá bô siánn môo, tō suî-piān hu-ián guá, guá tsiok m̄-kam! Bé siōng kuì ê sé-thâu-tsuí, senn-huat-iû bô puànn-hāng ú-hāu, tsia̍h Jiû-phuè koh kiann tī-tī bē tshio! Àm-sî kiânn tī ke-á-lōo, pîng-iú khue kóng guá sī lōo-ting, guá tsiok m̄-kam! Tsiok m̄-kam! Khòng-khòng-ngóo-khòng kap Tâi-tsik-tiān lóng bô bé--tio̍h, tshò-sit ki-huē, tsiok m̄-kam! Guá tsiok m̄-kam! Bāng-tio̍h bîng-pâi pau-pâi pau kuí-nā bān, muí tsi̍t ki lóng kòng-ku, guá tsiok m̄-kam! Khuànn lâng tuà tuā-tshù, tshīng bîng-pâi, ta̍k-kang tsiūnn pn̄g-kuán tsia̍h tuā-tshan, suàn-miā--ê suah kóng guá bô huâinn-tsâi miā, kiò guá láu-si̍t tsia̍h-thâu-lōo, mài siàu-siūnn, guá tsiok m̄-kam! Nā-ē kam! Tong-nî sàng i káu-tsa̍p-káu luí muî-kuì-hue, guá nā-ē kam! Guá nā-ē kam! Bé hiah-ê phua̍h-liān tsuàn-tsio̍h piáu sim-ì, tshuā i koh tshiánn siang-thâu tshia-tuī! Guá nā-ē kam! Tong-tshoo kóng kiann pûi m̄-guān senn, kiat-kó sian-lí tsit-má tsia̍h kah tshiūnn tshâ-pê! Tī mî-phuē lāi pàng tshàu-phuì, koh hiâm guá khùn ē kônn, kiò guá khì kheh-thiann kap káu khùn, guá tsiok m̄-kam! Tsiok m̄-kam! Jîn-sing nā-ē ba̍k tsi̍t-ē nih, jī-tsa̍p tang tō kuè--khì, tsiok m̄-kam! Guá tsiok m̄-kam! Í-tsîng kāu-tsa̍t ê hing-khám, nā-ē siau-hong piàn-sîng tik-sún-ling, guá tsiok m̄-kam! I-sing kíng-kò hiah siàu-liân tō sam-kuân, kiò guá ài khiām-tshuì, mài tsia̍h tinn, mài iû mài kiâm, mài lim-tsiú koh ài tsá khùn——Jîn-sing án-ne senn, kui-khì lâi-khì tsia̍h-tshài-tn̂g, guá si̍t-tsāi tsiok m̄-kam!

Ain't Swallowing It Ain't swallowing it! Pitch-black hair on my head in my youth, all started shedding after I left the army, Ain't swallowing it! Lord, Ain't swallowing it! The girl I fancied saw my thinning crown, brushed me off, and put me down, Ain't swallowing it! Bought high-dollar shampoo and hair tonics in vain, took Propecia scared my little brother wouldn't rise again—walking down the street at night, looking so bare my buddies mock me like a streetlamp glaring there, and I ain't swallowing it! Can't swallow this pill! Missed out on TSMC and the index fund, lost my chance, can't swallow this pill! Man, I can't swallow this pill! Dreamed up lottery numbers, spent tens of thousands, and struck out on every single bill! Folks living in mansions, draped in brand-name threads, feasting on banquets, stuffing their heads—the fortune teller says easy money ain't in my cards, told me to shut up and keep laboring hard, and I just can't swallow this! How can I swallow this! Ninety-nine red roses to her back then, how can I swallow this! No way I swallow this! Bought diamond chains to show my pride, hired a motorcade to take my bride! How can I swallow this! Said she feared getting fat so she wouldn't bear a child, now that angel's let herself go completely wild—farting under the sheets, bitching 'bout my snore, kicked me out to sleep with the dog on the floor, and I sure ain't swallowing this! Ain't swallowing this! How did life slip away in the blink of an eye, twenty years gone, ain't swallowing this! No, I ain't swallowing this! Once-proud chest gone completely flat, sagged like bamboo shoots, ain't swallowing this! Doctor warned me: high blood pressure, sugar, and fat all came too young—said cut the sweets, cut the grease, cut the booze, and hit the sack before day is done... If living is just misery, I might as well go live in a temple and become a monk, and I damn well ain't swallowing this!